There are so many definitions of self-love floating around…social media has defined it as something glamorous. Something that everybody needs to be focused on. Something you film and make sure the filters highlight the beauty of self-love. According to the Brain & Behavior Research Foundation, Jeffrey Borenstein, M.D. defines self-love as having a high regard for your own well-being and happiness. Self-love means taking care of your own needs and not sacrificing your well-being to please others. What we see on social media and how it is intended to be practiced are, in my opinion, misaligned. I feel this is important because the intention to practice self-love requires a person to take a step back and reflect on all aspects of their life and how they interact within their various relationships. I’m not an expert, but I have been trying to practice self-love for about 2 years now and it has brought me to many evenings of tears because of deep introspection. I have learned a few things along the way through my journey of personal healing and growth.
“Understanding is love. If you can’t understand, you cannot love. When you understand yourself, your suffering, you love yourself.”
– Thich Nhat Hanh
When I began I had to ask myself, what is ok about being me and what do I need to work on? At the beginning I was very critical of myself and THIS is where I realized that I needed to be more mindful about how I view myself and my decisions. Allowing myself the space to find balance in my responses.
Through this type of reflection I realized that my definition of self-love was different from what was on social media. You can’t necessarily photograph self-love. You practice it within yourself. Sitting with yourself and listening to your inner voice. It’s paying attention to how you respond during high stress. Do you react or do you give yourself time to respond? What does my inner dialogue sound like? Is it kind? Is it compassionate and motivating? Am I my biggest cheerleader when difficult times arise?
Addressing all of these questions have not been easy and I often find myself reflecting on them after a heavy interaction or a challenging situation. That is where the love I show to myself happens and can be practiced. I cannot stress how important it is to give yourself the opportunity to reflect on how we treat our inner ourselves.
Self-love is complicated and it is practiced with intention. With honesty. With vulnerability.
Self-love is the opportunity to develop a deeper sense of self and it is reflected in the way we show up for others during their moments of turbulence. Because if you can show yourself love, then you can empathize with others and support them the best way possible.
Heal yourself, so others can heal themselves too.
Do you practice self-love? If so, what have you discovered?
Share in the comments below.
Source: https://www.bbrfoundation.org/blog/self-love-and-what-it-means
Leave a Reply